A really serious Zutara fanfiction ( more or less)
by M.Shelley
Summary: Zuko is Fire Lord, but almost everyone thinks he is going insane. Katara has a child and no-one knows. How will this story turn out to be? A Zutara fanfiction
1. Chapter 1

_Somewhere in the Earth Kingdom_

She knew it had to happen. The day, her little girl started to ask questions. She really tried to avoid the contact with others, for her daughter and for herself, so nobody could find them and bring the idea up, that a child must have a father. And there now was this little girl with her big round eyes full of curiosity and fear, what the answer might be. Her amber, almost golden eyes that always reminded her of him.

But how could she explain the situation she had been in to a four-year-old that had almost never contact to other human beings ?

At this point she recognised the tears in her daughters eyes and she felt like the universe just had fallen onto her head. Katara bursted out in tears and hugged her little daughter tightly.

_In the chambers of the Firelord_

Zuko felt sorrow. A deep sorrow that lastet on him for almost five years now. Even if he tried to concentrate on one thing his thougts always drifted away to this person and the questions she left him with and which were burning him from inside for all this time.

He remembered how they both swore to each other that they never would part, that they would ever love each other, and two days later she was gone, gone, gone. The fact that she hadn't given him any explanation just hurts him more, because now there wasn't anything he could deal with, nothing he could argue against, it was driving him crazy and the worst on it was that the others were minding it.

Mai, the queen he had to choose after the love of his life left him broken, just had come up with a plan to overthrow him. She even had had the Fire sages on her side for they didn't trusted in his sanity anymore._ Even uncle Iroh thinks that I'm going to be like Azula, just a little later and worse for there is no Zuko to stop me._ Although the fate of his sister had hurt him, he still didn't want to be like her.

_Too bad I just can't send some of my people there or go there myself to search for her, I really could use her advise yet. _But who could he ask to do this? Her brother? _Hey, Sokka, long time not seen, could you please leave your family for a few weeks to travel to the Earth Kingdom for me, because I, the guy from who all think he's insane, think that your sister might be there and I want her here now?_Or ask his dear friend Aang? _As if he wouldn't search for her already, but not for me. I bet he's still angry of me. _Or maybe he should send a letter to Toph? _Okay, think again, send a letter to a blind woman._

Suddenly he had the idea he searched for: _Ask uncle if he could search for her! He's in the Earth Kingdom already and knows a lot of people there. _He immedeatly took out paper and ink and began writing.


	2. Chapter 2

_Irohs tea shop, Ba Sing Se_

Iroh was just about to drink his usual afternoon tea as a hawk landed before him. It had a scroll with the seal of the Firelord on its back. Iroh smiled: He hadn't heard from his nephew for quite a long time.

_I wonder how Zuko is now._ He always feared that his nephew wouldn't find his way, even yet, after the war, that Zuko would be like his father in ruling the country or worse.

With a sigh he opened the scroll and began to read:

_Dear uncle,_

_I would love to write that all things are going well, but they aren't._

_I know everyone thinks I will be the next insane in our family, honestly I myself think that this is not impossible. But they all don't know what it's like to do this job all alone. I know this sounds like whining, but..._

_Anyway, I don't want to write about the job, something other is bothering me all the time._

_You know I had this relationship with Katara a few years ago, right? Well, since she left all of my thoughts circle around her and why she left for she never gave a reason. Nobody knows where she is now, not even her brother or father, and so I thought that she may is in the Earth Kingdom, because there is much space to hide, you know. _

_What I wanted to write is that you could take some time and search for her?_

_I know all my theories sound like I'm loosing control of myself, and I think this could be true, but I need her, I really do. I feel like with her my life was full of energy and joy and everything was fine (and I was not going insane)._

_Please help me once again_

_Sincerely Zuko_

The face of the old general showed his mixed feelings. On the one hand he was happy for his nephew: He seemed to be aware of his problems and tries to solve them. But on the other hand he was rather worried about him and the view of Zukos handwriting doesn't seem to calm down his sorrows.

He thought of Zukos theory with Katara while he sipped the last of his tea. As he saw the bottom of his cup he had made a decision.

On the same day there was a sign of the door of his tea shop where the sad customers could read: "Closed"


	3. Chapter 3

_Somewhere in the Earth Kingdom_

"So I have a daddy?", the little girl asked. "Yes Xiatian, of course you have.", her mother started but was again interrupted by her daughter "But you won't tell me his name?". Katara just shook her head. " You're mean!" Now her daughter was shouting at her, storming out of the room crying. "But

Xia..." Katara started but the words faded in her mouth. Sadly she slung her arms around her knees and started to sob silently.

_Outer Ring of Ba Sing Se_

Iroh had thought long about how he should find Katara. First he tried to just ask the people if they had heard of a woman called Katara or a woman from the southern water tribe, a waterbender master, silly sure but it could have worked. Probably.

After two days of search (Yes, Ba Sing Se is _that_ large) the only thing he found out was that Katara obviously didn't want to be found. This whole thing was going to annoy him, even if it was for his nephew, who was like a son to him. _Finding people who don't want to be found is just rude to all people involved, _he thought with a sigh.

_On the other side Katara isn't stupid, so she wouldn't stay in the surrounding of a big city when she didn't want to be found. Ever in the case she isn't dead already._ He would never mention it to his nephew but that thought stayed in his mind during the whole search. _She could have went into an adventure and didn't return._ He tried to shoo that thought away. _If she had gone on an adventure she had at last told her family._

Suddenly he felt pain in his stomach. The old general looked down just to see a little boy rubbing his head. "Uhm, sorry...sir." the little one managed to say with a half-hearted grin.

Iroh started to give him some of his good advice as the little one interrupted him "Excuse me sir, but I don't have time for small talk, I have to buy some goods for the nice lady living out of my village and be out of the city before they close the door for the night.". The boy wanted to run away, but Iroh held his arm tightly. "Where is your village?".

Finally he had at least a clue where she could be.

_Palace of the Firelord_

Zuko sat on his desk what felt like a ton of paperwork before him.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door and without his permission a fire sage went in. The sage enrolled a scroll and started to read out loud what was written on it.

" Firelord Zuko,

we the Fire Sages consider it as our duty to the nation to secure its safety and well-being. With your currently state of mind we think it is better for you and all our people when you spend some time with doctors all around you, next to princess Azula. For this time we will rule the state.

Please don't fight us, we have thought a lot about this and have the permission of the Avatar.

You see even your friends do admit it. Now please follow the guards to your new home."

With the last sentence two guards came in lightly placing their hands on his shoulders.

Zuko knew when he had lost, so he stood up and followed them.

_Authors note: Xiatian is mandarin (chinese) for "summer", I thought it would fit: Not too obviously, not too unmeaning. _


	4. Chapter 4

_The forest around Katara's house_

Xiatian ran till the night began to fall. She couldn't make out everything in front of her and the trees were transforming in bizarre monsters.

Suddenly she fell over a root and hit the ground with a sound of pain and fear. She sat up and looked suspicious around her. Tears began to escape from her eyes as her expression changed into pure agony because of all the "monsters" around her.

Her instincts got over her and she set the wood on fire. This only made her fear worse because she didn't know why the wood was on fire or how the situation became this bad. Xiatian was never told about benders or her bending ability.

Screaming she looked around to find the way leading to her mother but all ways looked the same so she ran away from the fire, but this was the way deeper into the forest.

_Katara's house_

The tears faded slowly and as Katara noticed the sun getting lower she started to worry about her little girl.

Her daughter was really hurt by her acting. It seemed that Xiatian, the secret she tried to hide from the whole world just stormed of to tell everyone of her existence.

Katara couldn't help but smile by the thought of her little daughter standing in front of her saying something like _"Mommy, I'm really sorry, really, really sorry. But I can not come home for dinner tonight because I have to tell all people in the world, especially Lady Mai and who else who wants to kill me, that I exist and that I am right here." _, with this puppy-look she always had when she really wanted something like a new toy.

Katara suddenly turned around when she heard the sounds of flames and burning wood.

As she ran out of the house she saw that the fire was too big for her to get it out and that it was almost approaching her house. _ S_he knew from who the fire was started _I have never told her of bending,_, _she must be in danger if her instincts take control like that._

Katara ran into the burning forest calling for her little daughter.


	5. Chapter 5

_A Lunatic asylum in the Firenation_

Zuko sat in his little room, thinking about everything. That was all he could do. Think. Think about himself, about Katara, his uncle, Azula and all the other ones he cared about.

His thoughts drifted off to his country. _I hope the Fire sages are doing well. I hope they take good care of the people._

His mind was suddenly again where it always headed after five minutes for the last five years. Katara. _Why, oh, why do you had to leave? Why didn't you stay with me here? Why do you have to torture me like that? Anyway, I hope you're fine, I really hope you're fine. You have to be, at least you have to be fine._

Tears began to roll down his face as he closed his eyes. He understood why his sister's mind never got better when she was treated like that.

_A Forest in the Earth Kingdom_

Suddenly Xiatian bumped into something hard. She fell back and whatever she ran against did it too. "Ouch. This is the second time in one day someone ran into my stomach. I'm really getting too old for such adventures.", the thing said in the tone of an old man.

Xiatian answered rubbing her head "Well, this is the second time I hit my head in a few hours." Xiatian couldn't see it, but Iroh (of course it was him) looked really surprised by hearing the voice of a little girl in a deep forest while night was approaching.

Smiling widely he knelt down to the girl and touched her head carefully. "I suppose your mommy isn't happy about this."

She looked down to her feet ashamed and said her voice heavy from the tears "I can't go home any more. I can not tell mommy any more that I-I-I'm so sorry, so terribly sorry.", with this she began crying into his arms.

"Shhh. Why shouldn't you go home? Do you not find the way any more?"

"I don't find the way any more, but this doesn't matter. I ran into the forest. Suddenly there was fire all around and I just had one way left to flee. And this way led me here and not home, so my home is burning and my mommy is in it.", again tears, crying, sobbing.

"Where is your home, tell me." all of sudden there was a bit of steel in the old generals voice, "I can go and search for your mother. I am a firebender, it probably won't hurt me." , that was a lie, but it didn't matter, if this little girl was who he expected her to be. There wasn't so many nice ladies living out here "alone" and the features of this girl reminded him of his nephew.

The voice of the girl brought him back to reality "What do you mean "firebender"?", she asked with wide eyes.

_Crap._ "Didn't your mommy tell you about it? Anyway, I have to find her. I'll bring you to a clearing I saw earlier. There is a little pond and there are many places where you can hide if someone tracks you down.", he stopped the girl with a gesture from intervening, "There will probably be such persons. You hide there and go with no one except for me and your mommy, ok?" , the girl nodded, "One last thing, if neither your mommy or I come back till tomorrow afternoon you take this money, go to the next carriage station and rent one that takes you to an island named Kyoshi. There lives a man named Sokka, he is your uncle, he will help you if you tell him who you are. Now come on, the fire is almost approaching us." with these words he took her hand and led her into the forest.


	6. Chapter 6

_Deep in the Earth Kingdom Forest_

"Xiatian! Darling! Please answer me! I'm sorry for what I said!" Katara screamed louder and louder looking after her little daughter while running threw the burning woods. Finally her voice started to strike and she couldn't get any air. She fell to her knees and started to cry with a cracking voice: "I'm so sorry, so sorry,please come back...".

She slung her arms around herself as she heard a familiar voice.

"Katara, are you okay?". She wanted to hug the speaker, she never thought of hearing this old man's voice again.

She looked up to him with a wide smile. "Iroh." she said, before the knowledge of her daughter in this flames came back to her mind. "Iroh, I can't explain yet, but there's a little girl in this flames. She for sure is very afraid of it. Please, we have to find her." Her vision blurred, she sank to the bottom, the last thing she saw before everything got black was Iroh's worried face.

_At a clearing with a pond_

Xiatian hid herself in a small bush for hours now. She hadn't heard anything of the old man nor her mother yet and she was very concerned about them. Also she was freezing in the nights cold wind, so far from the flames.

She wondered who the old man might was.

Was he a relative? He looked somehow like her except for his white hair, which was strangely arranged around his mouth.

Would he know who her daddy might be? Why did he know who she was? What didn't he know?

A sound in the dark made her jump, but it was nothing but a rattle of leaves.

Her breath got heavier for several minutes because of it.

She was cold and lonely, afraid, wanted her mommy to be with her and go home right now. Without her minding it tears began to fall down the little face.

_At the throne room in the Fire nation_

Mai was not amused, even if she was sitting in the throne she ever wanted. The reason of her momentary mood was the stupid Sage before her.

" Do you want to mock me?" she asked him with a tone of danger in her voice. The Sage minded it as well, his face showing his fear clearly, but he held his ground.

"I'm sorry, your majesty, but we can't crown you Fire Lord. You can't bend and this is a essential ability the Fire Lord must have.

"Then at least do what I say and execute this idiot of a husband and his family." - "But your majesty, the people would be angered about..." - "Do it already!" - "Yes, your majesty, I will take care that they will be killed next week."


	7. Chapter 7

_In the Earth Kingdom Forest_

Xiatian heard footsteps approach her hideout. With a silent whimper she hid herself deeper in he bush she was in.

Then a dark figure rose before her.

It didn't look like a human figure and it seemed to breath quite heavily. She had to hold on herself to not jump out of the bush.

The figure let go of something with a deep sigh. Its voice sounded like the old man she met earlier.

Suddenly there was a light. Now she saw it was coming from the palm of the old mans hand and it was a little flame, not like those in the woods.

Also she saw what he had let go of.

Her first thought was _Oh no, she's dead! Mommy is dead! How am I ever to live again if she's not with me?_

Then she noticed the chest of her mother slightly moving and her muscles relaxed again.

The Old Man started to look around apparently searching for something. That was when she got aware of the fact that she was still sitting in the bushes, not visible for anybody.

At once she got out of it and ran up to her mother. She cuddled up next to her and began stroking her cheek while tears started to fall.

The face of the old man turned into a wide smile when he saw this.

_The next Morning_

Kataras eyes opened slowly, her vision was blurred for a few moments. She just saw green all around her. Then she noticed the warm little body next to her. Her daughter was still sleeping, cuddled up next to her, clenching on the fabric of her dress. Smiling widely she hugged her tightly.

Her daughter slowly opened her big round eyes and looked up to her tiredly. "Mommy? Are you alright?" the girl asked.

"Of course I am, Sweetheart." her mother replied. Both of them got up in seconds when they heard somebody stomping through the woods. Katara's eyes widend when she made out who it was. "Iroh" she said her mouth curling up in a grin again.

"I got us some breakfast from the next village. Go on and eat, we have a lot to talk about. I'll make us some tea."

Xiatian ate happily while her mother and the man called Iroh talked about things she only partly understood. They talked about another man called Zuko and someone named Mai. Then it came to something called Fire Sages and Fire Lord and Fire Nation which she didn't understand at all. But at one point she listened up. Iroh was speaking "You know, my nephew still does love you." which made her mother stiffen and afterwards she was somewhat very sad. The little girl gave her mother a questioning look but she wouldn't say a word. At some point Iroh intervened "And you didn't tell her anything, did you?"

"No" Katara said lamely. Suddenly Xiatian felt rage boiling inside her, but Iroh knew this look all too well from his nephew and calmed the little One down by saying "She didn't want to hurt you, you're far too young for this and there are people who want to hurt you, you might have harmed yourself. All your mother wanted was you to be safe."

By Iroh saying so Katara almost cried. Her daughter looked up to her in concern. Then she craddled in her lap and hugged her tightly.

After what seemed like an eternity Katara let go but Xiatian refused to do so. Whisoering in her mother's ear she said "So, I am going to know who my daddy is now, eh?" .

Her mother answered "Yes, and we are going to rescue him." , "From what? Is he in danger?" the little girl asked confused which caused Iroh and Katara to laugh.


	8. Chapter 8

_A Lunatic Asylum in the Fire Nation_

Suddenly in the middle of his meditation a knock was heard upon the massive iron door that was keeping him from getting out of his cell. He didn't find it worth a response, the opening of this door was not his decision to make.

The door opened and a guard stood before him. He readied himself as if he was to deliver a great speech before thousands of people: "Lord Zuko", he began," I have to make the announcement that the doctors are sure you won't do better anymore and so decided that it is the best for your own sake to embrace death. Together with Lady Mai they came to the decision that you will be killed next Tuesday along with your father and your sister. Please note that the right of your last wish will be not granted to you for you are considered insane.", that he spoke without taking any air and so he had to take a deep breath afterward. Just when Zuko thought he had finished, he added "and there came a letter for you."

The guard set the paper down on the floor and made his way out leaving Zuko staring after him for a few minutes. As he regained his composure he unfolded the letter and read:

"_My dear nephew,_

_when I received your letter I started searching for Katara right away. _

_Well, to make a long story short, after days of search I found her in a small cottage middle in the woods outside of Ba Sing Se. As it seems now, she hid there from the entire world for reasons I cannot yet tell. But it seems she has born a little girl and personally I think that could be the very reason we were searching for. _

_I met them both parted from each other by a great fire, caused by the little girl that didn't know anything about bending. When I met her she was really afraid of it. Meanwhile Katara was in the woods searching for this little girl not even minding the harm that attached her own body. When I finally found her she was near to unconsciousness and really passed away while I was standing in front of her. She has not awoken yet and I am on my way to get her to a doctor along with her daughter, that is why I cannot make any safe attempts in this case._

_But here is what I think:_

_1\. You and Katara shared beds at least once while she was still in the Fire Nation._

_2\. She got pregnant around this time. The girl's birthday is in the middle of summer ca. eight months after Katara left you._

_3\. So, concerning the girl looks a lot like you when you were around her age, I think she probably is your child._

_4\. That might be the reason for Katara to hide. There are a lot of people who would want this girl to die, first up front Mai._

_I will get them both back to my tea shop and from there to the Fire Nation when Katara is doing better. We have a lot to talk about now nephew._

_We will see us as soon as possible._

_Sincerely Iroh_

_PS: No one seems to get information about what is going on in the Fire Nation lately. What happened?"_

Zuko stared at the paper in disbelief. He couldn't have a child, could he? A little girl, his little girl….

It was overwhelming. When he finally woke up from his trance he took up an empty paper and began writing.

_Author's Note: Please forgive me for taking so long with updates, I'm considering myself the worst person ever. Thanks for the following it anyway! Please Review:)_


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